Friday, February 15, 2008

A Hard Spam's Night

Can I tell you? (Not right now.)
It’s important (Okay, go ahead.)
A penis is a terrible thing to waste. (I thought that was a mind? Oh, wait, for some people that is their mind)
Tired of losing your erection halfway, or having a small weener? Change it today … (Is this like light bulbs? Can you go to the store and buy them in a four pack? How about generics?)
Works so good, you will poke your eye out … guarenteed. (Oh, I can imagine that’s everyone’s goal – poke that eye right out.)
Elvincockwalloping (Well, Elvin can go wallop his cock somewhere else.)
Reduce your debts the professional way. (I’d rather do it unprofessionally, thank you.)
Methodist watches. (Watches have religion? What does a Christian Scientists watch look like?)
Hello band saw. (Goodbye staple gun)

19 comments:

Marty said...

Awesome! I, for one, would like to see what a Scientologist watch looks like. Now THAT might poke my eye out.

Bailey Stewart said...

That just reminds me of that line from A Christmas Story

Ranurgis said...

Still as funny as ever. Way to go.

Ruby55

I first used my Ranurgis "persona" when I logged into my gmail.com account. Now I can't change it if I want to keep the features

bebo said...

"Elvincockwalloping" - I'd say that Elvin definitely knows about wasting a penis...

*snort*

And sweetie, I wanta know the name of the store where we can buy them in a 4-pack.. ;>

Melissa said...

This one's my fave this week:

A penis is a terrible thing to waste. (I thought that was a mind? Oh, wait, for some people that is their mind)

Thanks for the laugh, Bailey!

Bailey Stewart said...

Thank you Ruby. I'll get used to ranurgis.

Bailey Stewart said...

When I find out Bebo, I'll let you know. Maybe it's that meat market at Walmart ...

Bailey Stewart said...

I'm glad I could give you a "before the weekend" laugh Melissa. Yeah, that's one of my favorites too.

Tori Lennox said...

Maybe your neighbors should get a Methodist watch. It might not be as apt to be stolen as their alarm clock. *g*'

Brandy said...

It's funny, the first few sentences sound like an actual conversation!
I'm not sure generics would work as well. *g*

Great spam, thanks Bailey, for the laughs!

Bailey Stewart said...

Tori - are you suggesting that Methodists aren't worth anything? ROFLMAO - I'm Methodist!!! Which is another reason I thought that particular piece of spam was funny.

Bailey Stewart said...

Toots! You know, some generics are just as good as the brand names. Uh huh. (Bailey is nodding her head here)

Okay folks, I've got to get back to packing.

Tori Lennox said...

No, no, no! I just thought the thieves might be afraid of Divine Retribution if they stole a Methodist watch. *g*

Bailey Stewart said...

Oh, you back-pedal well little one. *gg*

glenice said...

too funny!!!

I agree with Brandy...sounds like you are having a real conversation :)

Bailey Stewart said...

I try to make it that way.

catslady said...

I can't believe I forgot today was Friday and expecially spam friday. They really did make me lol. I'm thinking "Elvincockwalloping (Well, Elvin can go wallop his cock somewhere else.)" is my new favorite! Thanks.

catslady said...

and I can't spell - especially duh

Bailey Stewart said...

We all make typoes.

I'm glad you liked them - you needed the laugh.