Friday, July 10, 2009

I just like sitting on the floor .....

This months new authors list (with interpretations in parenthesis in case you need them). Keep an eye out for these up and coming new writers:

Iris Johanseen
Tami Hong (Hoag)
Linda Lucille Miller
Stephanie Lawrence (Laurens)
Gil Grisham (John)
Herman Hessee (Hesse)
John Steinbuck

Irritating young man comes up to the counter with a book:

“I think you put this in the wrong place”
I look at the book – it’s about Samurai.
“Where did you find it?”
“Oh, it was in the martial arts section, it should really be in Eastern Philosophy/religions.”
Now mind you, I had only been off cigarettes for two days.
My co-worker, Morgan, with a glance my way. “No, it’s in the right place.”
“It doesn’t belong in martial arts” he said with an ingratiating smile.
I silently hold out my hand, eyes never leaving his face. He hands the book to me and, still not looking away from him, I flip it open to the first page, the flap of the dust cover showing.
“What does that say on top?”
He looks.
“Out loud please.”
“Martial Arts”
“End of discussion.” I snap the book closed and take it over to the martial arts section. As I walk away I hear him mumble “I still say it’s in the wrong section.”
I was really proud of myself as I kept walking …. hearing Morgan say “I wouldn’t today if I were you dude.”

“Paperbacks Plus in Mesquite”
“I’m on my way to hook up your ATT&T Universal”
“My what? This is a bookstore”
“This isn’t an apartment complex?”
Yes, I live in an apartment complex named Paperbacks Plus ……

“Paperbacks Plus in Mesquite”
“Marquetta ?”
“No Corbett, it’s me. You’ve dialed yourself”
Even my own co-workers don’t listen to the person who answers. How can you mistake Mesquite for Lakewood? On a side note, I don’t think I’ve see Corbett with as sheepish of a look on his face when he came around the corner.

“Paperbacks Plus in Mesquite”
“Is this the bookstore?”
No, it’s an apartment complex ….

“Do you pay cash for items?”
“Some, but we’re very selective. What do you have?”
“An entire set of World Book Encyclopedias, 1980s”
“No, I’m sorry, we can’t even sell the ones from the 90s.”
“How about magazines?”
“We never pay cash for magazines.”
“Not even from the 70s? They’re vintage”
I’ll forget she said that ….

I’m sitting on the floor, rearranging books on the bottom shelves of two columns. I have books stacked all around me.
“Do you work here?”
No, I just like to go into stores and sit on the floors to mess with their stuff. What hobbies do you have?


Brandy said...

So, I would be the customer that drives you batty. When I visit the UBS and I see Mystery shelved with romance, I point it out. I'll just apologize now. *G*

I like these bookstore anecdotes better than Spamarama!

Bailey Stewart said...

Oh, that wouldn't drive me batty as long as you were correct and didn't still insist despite the evidence of where the publisher expects it to be shelved. By all means, you see Stephanie Laurens in our mystery section, or Patricia Cornwell in the romance, please, please let us know! LOL

Lis said...

lmao, you know those conversations should be subbed to Readers Digest! :)

Susan said...

I bow down to you and your patiences. I would have probably smacked the guy on the back of his head!

catslady said...

I too enjoy these more than the spam now lol. Nothing is weirder than the real thing but it's your comments that make it funnier.

Bebo said...

Can I come over to the bookstore & sit on your floor? It's better than dealing w/ people at my work!

Too cute! (btw: I'd have smacked that kid upside the head w/ that book)