From Spam With Love

Sorry for being late. (Don’t do it again)
Do you remember me? (No, it’s been a while)
I itself purgatory (Why the hell not)
Found this on-line. (Put it back)
Herb wants to get Marty drunk at Bubba’s wedding. (Forget about Marty, I want to talk about Bubba’s wedding.)
What’s your future? (I see endless spam)
If this makes it to the front page, you have him to thank. (If this makes it to the front page, it’s a slow news day)
Is that possible? (Probably not, Paris Hilton could have a hang-nail)
We felt welcome and our humanity honored. (You must have been somewhere else)
Your neighbor’s have lost their alarm clock. (again with the alarm clock, why don’t they just get a sundial)
I found it! (Give that to me)
Want to hold a brick on your dick? (Once again, ouch)
If a relaxing moment turns into the right moment, will you be ready? (I don’t know, there’s that matter of the brick.)