Thursday, August 16, 2007

It's Spamarama Friday!

Can't do the spam again, it's too hot to think, so here's another repeat from May 2006. Enjoy! And yes, I know that it republishes all of the comments too - I don't care.


I'm not guaranteeing anything this time. I'm half asleep, but we'll see what I can do. For the uninitiated, this is actual spam that comes to me every single day. Loverly, ain't they? So I have nothing better to do than to talk back at them. I know, pathetic.

How hot is this? (Well, right now it’s only 69, but I hear it’s going to be hotter tomorrow)

Tell me (What? Don’t just stand there and demand things. It's my in-box.)

My true friend (Um, I don’t even know your name, but okay.)

Rube (City Slicker)

Quixotic retort (Sancho Panza dresses you funny.)

It’s not working like it used to? (Well, you know, you get older and things happen.)

Bill Gates got one (Bill Gates can afford it.)

They envy you (Why? ‘Cuz I know that Bill Gates got one?)

Hen (Heifer)

Your neighbors lost their alarm clock (I’m getting a little tired of this freakin’ alarm clock!)

Don’t speak to the parrot (Why? Did he take the alarm clock?)

Last offer – Discount Special for PE patch almost over! (Why didn’t you tell me this back in High School – I hated gym.)

Want to make a baby? nerygudi (Not really R2D2)

Erection still possible Lula (Really! Does the National Enquirer know?)

Urgent Neighborhood House assessment information (All I know is that the neighbors can’t keep track of their alarm clock. And their house is ugly too.)

Misconstrue exhumation (You either dig it up or not. What’s so hard about that?)

Replica for you (Only if its Hugh Jackman.)

Evaluate your local stores and keep what you buy. (I don’t know where you’ve been shopping, but I always get to keep what I buy.)

Anonymously (No, if I write a check, they usually know who I am – the names right there.)

Here’s some ideas about this Monday. (Let’s get this straight. Friday is spamarama day, not Monday. Don’t you even think about showing up on Monday.)

55 comments:

Lis said...

lol some good ones here.

You know I checked my own spam folder this week and now I'm getting some 'interesting' ones too lol Something about custom logos or something

Diane said...

I've been getting the do-you-have-erectile-problems-? one all week. Uh, no. I'm a girl.

raine said...

Soooo...how's that erection thing going, Eve?
Thank goodness it's not too late!

Bailey Stewart said...

Lis - I've started something. A lot of people have begun checking their spam folders.

Diane - What gets me - a lot of them have a woman's name at the end, like Lula.

Raine - Yeah, but I don't feel so bad since I've heard that the problem is on the rise everywhere. *gg*

Shirley said...

Brilliant, Eve. I'm getting told on a daily basis that rumours are rife about be not being able to satisfy my girlfriend. I must try harder... :o)

Marty said...

The ones that make me scratch my head are the XXX hot anime action. I'm not sure why that would be remotely hot.

Bailey Stewart said...

Shirley - She's going to leave you if you don't *gg*

Marty - they're just drawn that way. *gg*

Joely Sue Burkhart said...

Oooh, I want me some of that Hugh Jackman replica!!!

Dennie McDonald said...

Replica for you (Only if its Hugh Jackman.)
Make it Chris Cagle and you're on!

Bailey Stewart said...

One Hugh Jackman and one Chris Cagle - I'll give them your order. *gg*

Toni Anderson said...

I'll have a Sean Bean and an Eric Bana please. You can be too careful with replicants.

OOhh.. Does anybody else hate that ad, is it DQ? With the guy with the long hair carrying that other guy's wife? DH said, hah hah, looks like one of your romance novels. I gave him a lecture about cover art and the book etc etc and expectations and blah blah blah.
It was good :)

Toni Anderson said...

honest

Toni Anderson said...

really

Bailey Stewart said...

Toni - would you like to supersize that?

Tori Lennox said...

I may have to have a Spamarama Friday today, too. Though mine aren't as good as yours!

christa said...

I really needed those this morning, I ran out of cream for my coffee. Milk just does't taste the same.
I always get something about horny housewives in my spam folder.

Kelley said...

LOL. YOu are too funny.

Bailey Stewart said...

Tori - nothing like a good dose of spam.

Christa - I need cream for my coffee too.

I'm having a lousy morning - low grade fever and sneezing my head off. I'm probably going to lay low, after I finish my blogging.

Bailey Stewart said...

Hey Kelley - thanks!

Melissa Marsh said...

"Replica for you" - Oh yeah! If I could have a replica, it would DEFINITELY be Hugh Jackman! Or maybe Clive Owen...hmm...tough choice!

Bailey Stewart said...

Melissa - if only that were our toughest choices. *g*

Bailey Stewart said...

Oh, and Toni - I haven't seen that commercial yet, but then I'm usually watching things on tape and fast forwarding through the commercials. I'll try to be on the lookout for it.

Glenice said...

These are soo funny! you know you make them funny with your responses to them :)

I seem to be having a lot of erectile problems myself...which really explains a lot of my problems!!!!

Have a great weekend ;) you are painting this weekend? I can not remember...I get to work all weekend!! Yippie!!!

Bailey Stewart said...

Thank you Glenice. No, painting next weekend. I've still got a lot of packing to do, not sure how much I'm going to get done today.

Susan said...

I get a lot from 'Criminal Justice Professionals' which makes me wonder if they know about that email I sent you the other day. Yikes!!

Bailey Stewart said...

Susan - I didn't tell them, honest.

Loreth Anne White said...

LOL, EVE .. .thanks for the chuckle !!!! Just what I need on a snowy day in May.

Bailey Stewart said...

It's snowing! Loreth, don't tell me that. I hate summer.

Scott said...

I had to change accounts lately, so my age old email is no more. My new one, the one you can reply to on blogger, has been active for almost a year and a half, and so far I get very little spam. I suppose I haven't used it for signing up for things online. I detest spam--duh, right?

Bailey Stewart said...

Note to self: Unsubscribe Scott from the Victoria's Secret mailing list.

christa said...

Eve- Hope you feel better soon.
I guess I'll venture out to the store to get some cream otherwise I won't have any tomorrow.
Toni- The Arnold voice is really irritating in that commercial.

Brandy said...

How do you get all the funny spam? We only get stock offers and financial stuff. :( You did great again. Hope you feel better!!!

Bailey Stewart said...

Christa - I'm trying. Lunch and then nap time. I've gotta see this commercial now.

Bailey Stewart said...

Brandy - there's a sign on the house that says "send all good spam here." *gg*

Toni Anderson said...

Snort :)

One Six, One Six, One Six.

Got it?

Not my fault you got misinformation, Deb obviously had her brain screwed on wrong this morning :) I was going to say, honest :)

catslady said...

I must get from 50-100 pieces of spam a day but I'm enjoying yours a lot more lol.

I like mine strong and black (gg)

I put aside the sequel and started reading my Shalvis. So glad I did -I can tell already that I'm going to love it.

Hope you're feeling better soon. I know my allergies have been killing me.

Lis said...

Hope you're feeling better soon.
The DQ commericial's funny the first few times you see. Still doesn't beat the Lovitz subway ones *g*

Kelly Parra said...

Great ones, Eve! You know I do believe you get this much spam. I know I do! =D

Bailey Stewart said...

Toni - but were you going to say soon enough for people to mail things? Nooooooo. *sigh*

Jeanne - what? You're coffee or your spam? Glad you're enjoying The Shalvis, but then everyone knows my opinion of her writing and are in fact probably rolling their eyes right now saying yes Eve. Jill Shalvis is the best romance writer there is. *gg*

Lis - feeling a little better, enough to know that I'm just having a nice sinus infection going, nothing serious.

Kelly - I have 149 pieces of spam in a special folder right now just waiting. And I do get that alarm clock one every.single.week.

Toni Anderson said...

:)

Bailey Stewart said...

Toni - so you think you've outsmarted me, don't you. bwaaaaahhaaaaa

Carol said...

I would much rather read your spamarama than my spam! lol These are good!

Bailey Stewart said...

You never know - you might have some hidden gems there too. I'm glad you enjoyed them.

ruby55 said...

Hi, I'm sort of back. I've spent all my computer time this week either trying to find a Word document e-mailed to me that I had to fill out and just "Saved" instead of "Saved As". On Monday, I sent it back completed to the sender and got a note 3 minutes later: "The form is blank." I had an appointment on Thurs. to talk more about it. It took me about 4 hours on Sunday to answer all the questions on the 15-page form. No short answers, just long ones. I Do Not Want To Do It Again.

Then I also tried to install my new 3-in-1 printer. Spent hours alone on that and then over 3 hours with support tech. It does some things but will not perform the, for me at the moment, most important function--scanning. My computer does have the minimum requirements but, it seems, it won't do all the functions. So now I have to get a computer to go with my printer. Argh.

At least I got a good laugh out of the last 2 days that I read of your blog. Both are great.

What I e-mailed you was just to show you the type of junk-mail I seem to be getting a lot of right now. I have no idea which language it is. In fact, I suspect it's not any language and perhaps a conglomeration of alphabets. I can recognize some of the letters but overall...?
I wrote a little note for yesterday's too.

Michele, hugs and prayers are winging their way to you and your family. I'm glad things are looking up but I guess until everything is "normal" again, it will still be a worry. Take care and keep hope and a positive attitude.

Bailey Stewart said...

Sorry about all of the computer problems. I hope you get it cleared up soon.

And I'm glad I could give you a laugh.

Sandy J said...

I love spamarama Fridays with you, Eve!

Bailey Stewart said...

And I love spending them with you Sandy.

Michele said...

LOL, Eve! I got your note.
Ha, I LURKED today...*gg*

Too funny..How come my SPAM is never as fun as yours? Mine just wants me to be an FBI agent or a PI - which when you think of it is kind of cool.

Hail SPAM!!

Bailey Stewart said...

City Chickie - that is cool, you lurker you. How am I to know you've been here if you don't tell me?

Rebecca Airies said...

Hi Eve,

My spam faves are the erectile enhancers addressed to obvious female names. That's a grin every time and the 'hey (insert female name, I'd love to meet a man like you.'

Bailey Stewart said...

Yeah, I get those too Lula.

Thanks for dropping by Rebecca.

Brandy said...

I still say you get the best Spam! Hope you feel better soon. The heat is awful this summer!
Have a good weekend.

Susan said...

Hope you get a break from the heat soon!

Loreth Anne White said...

I wish some of my spam *would* go into my spam folder instead of sneaking thru. Hmrph.

Just popping into to say hi, Bailey! And to get my spam fix ... lol, like I don't have any of my own. But at least yours gives me a laugh :)

Toni Anderson said...

LOL--weird seeing old comments :)