Do you believe in miracles?

(UPDATE, FEBRUARY 26, 2009:oops, I guess I shouldn't have deleted those pictures from photobucket, huh? But read anyway if you hadn't, the full meaning of this blog is in the story near the end)

I know I’ve talked a lot about Hurricane Ike but could you please indulge me one more time? To set up this story, I need to show you a few more pictures of the damage from the storm. Please read to the end. Thank you. Unless specified, all pictures are of Galveston.

Here’s the hurricane as it approaches. Yes, the house burned to the ground, no way to get to it. Besides, in all likelihood this house wouldn’t have survived anyway.




Here’s a shrimp boat in Louisiana that was tossed several feet across the highway.



A truck completely turned over and submerged.



A submerged cemetery.



Here’s a neighborhood in Clear Creek Channel, on the Bolivar Peninsula on Galveston Island, overcome by the gulf.



A road in Bridge High Island, Galveston, that was completely destroyed.



So much sand brought up by the storm that it entombed cars. This is in Gilchrist, another town on the Bolivar Peninsula.




And let’s not forget Winnie, Texas.



But the most astonishing is this picture of a barge that was lifted and tossed 6 miles from its berth in Port Arthur, Texas.



I’m showing you these to give you an idea (if you didn’t already have one) of the sheer force of the winds and power of Hurricane Ike. If it could do this to a truck, shrimp boat, town and even a barge, what could it do to a houseboat moored to a pier in a marina in Galveston?

A man went back to Galveston recently during the island’s look and leave period. Residents were allowed in for a short time during the day (the island is still locked down from dusk to dawn) to check on their homes and property. The car he rode in took him down into Galveston to the marina where his houseboat had been left. He could see other boats smashed up against the walls of nearby apartment houses or in parking lots, like this one.



As they entered the marina, he could also see that other boats were sunk, the tops barely showing above the water. His heart sunk the further they went into the marina. As they rounded a bend he couldn’t believe what he saw. Utter destruction surrounded him, and yet, there tied up to the pier, was his houseboat. Yes, no other boat around it. There was a little bit of water inside and the tarp was torn, but otherwise, his boat was fine. Everything was as he had left it on that Friday when Ike approached. His was the only boat to survive. He spent that day pumping out most of the water before he had to leave. Then the phone call to his father, his father’s phone call to me. You see, that man is my nephew and when we all had thought he had lost everything; he lost nothing except for his car. But you can get another car; you can never replace the sentimental things you own. And he lost none of it.


Yes, there are miracles.

Oh, the winner of Jill Shalvis' two Blazes Flashpoint and Flashback is

roll of drum .....

Brandy!!! You go girl!!

Thank you to everyone that entered. Thank you Yan! Please come back again. And Crystal - great to hear from you again.

See everyone on Wednesday.

Spamcrula

Good morning! (It’s not morning you moron. Oh wait, technically it is I guess.)
Told you. (Don’t rub it in spammy, I can delete you at any time.)
You be late. (Story of my life. What am I late for now?)
What really helpful for a man? (A woman with a map?)
I’ve seen it before. (I very much doubt it, you’re a man …)
I wanted to make a conquest. (Honey, it never hurts to want. Builds character.)
You only deserve the best, get it here. (Hugh is here?)
Wish to add more fire into your bedroom life? (Good grief, the only chance of that happening is if I built a fireplace.)
First Franklin loan. (And John Adams still hasn’t paid it back … )
It’s Susan. (No it isn’t!! You stop that right now!!!)




Oh, and the book contest? Did you really comment 'cuz you want them, or were you just commenting. Kinda hard to tell since no one said anything. There also aren't a lot of "contestants" so I'm going to expand it 'til Monday.

A blog about nothing

Its 4 minutes to 1:00 am. That’s important, ‘cuz I said so. My blog is always posted at 1:00 am every Monday, Wednesday and Friday morning. Always. It’s just that I can’t think of anything to blog about. I know, I’m about as interesting as paint drying. Okay, have you heard the one about the Rabbi and the … oh, you have? Hmmm, well what about Why did Cinderella get thrown out of Disneyland? Oh, wait, I can’t tell that one here, can I? Give me a break will ya? Oh, I know, um, no … that’s really lame.

So, let’s try this a new way. I really do like this time of year, when Texas decides to cooperate and participate in this thing called Fall. Yep, wonderful crisp mornings in the 60s, my kind of temperatures; I can open the windows and turn off the air. The cats like it too, not to mention the mad palpitations my bank account does when it realizes we won’t have to fork over another couple of million for the electric bill. Okay, so I exaggerate, only half a million. Wonderful, that’s even less exciting than paint drying.

I give up. Here, watch this it’s cute. Honest.







Oh, wait!!! I have extra copies of Jill's books Flashpoint and Flashback, her last two Blazes! Anyone want them? All you have to do is comment and I'll draw names. Come on, you know you want to.

My Husband made me wear a lifejacket inside our house

"My Husband made me wear a lifejacket inside our house. Thank God for that, or I wouldn't be here."




2,000 people now want off of Galveston Island, people that refused to evacuate before Hurricane Ike struck. 2,000 very lucky people. Ike was supposed to produce 50 foot waves, an event of such catostrophic proportions that those 2,000 people would have surely died. But they were saved by a miracle. At the last minute the mighty storm made a slight turn and as minute as that movement was it was enough to save their lives. Volunteers scoured the streets the next day, picking up frightened dogs and putting them in the back of pick-up trucks. Neighbors checked on neighbors, family inland worried for their loved ones. But even though Ike didn't produce the mortality rates that were expected, the utter destruction was what most experts predicted.




"I didn't consider my property beachfront property. Now it is."













I'm posting these pictures because I need for you to understand the destruction in Galveston alone, not to mention Houston (the 4th largest city in the U.S., will be closed down for days) and in Southwestern Louisiana, not to mention other parts of the Gulf coast. I need you to know this because I'm going to ask you to do something. The American Red Cross' General Fund is depleted. Hurricane's Gustav and Hanna, plus the tragic collision between a commuter train and a freighter in California, has bled them dry. Could you please, even just a little bit, consider giving to the Red Cross. Thank you.




Houston

American Red Cross

Spam got blown away

Sorry, but as I sat down tonight (this is Thursday evening you know) I really tried to be funny, but I couldn't do it. Not just because today was September 11, but the thought of being funny while my nephew works his way north and out of Ike's reach didn't seem right. Poor Dave. He'll lose everything - if he doesn't it will be a miracle. As I mentioned when Gustav was approaching, he lives on a houseboat in Galveston. A houseboat that he couldn't take out of the water and store somewhere. A houseboat that he had to leave moored at the dock, vulnerable to the furry of what is now a category 2 hurricane. We all know what will win that fight. And knowing Dave like I do, I doubt that he made enough money to carry insurance.

As for us, we're definitely getting rain this time. How much depends upon just where it lands, and how it turns once it does. From what I understand (and remember, another 24 hours until landfall, a lot can change) we'll either get severe storms, tropical storm winds, flooding and tornadoes OR we'll get severe storms (but not as much rain), strong winds and flooding.

And today, September 11. I get real contemplative on this day. I remember where I was, and I remember mother. Sometimes it's like it was yesterday, other times a distant memory.

Oh, the book. I drew names and the winner is Tori!!!!! I'll double check that address with you.

I'm going to leave you now with a little 9/11 tribute. Stay safe, stay well and if you do something interesting take notes - you know I live vicariously through you.

I'm Gonna Give You a Break

It’s been a long time since I had a give-away that I thought it would be fun to do it again. This is the book that I bought at Michelle Mile’s book signing last Saturday. Yes, it is autographed. Here’s a little bit about the book from Amazon.com.

A Break in Time

The truth could set them free or tear them apart forever. Book 2 of the Adventures of Ransom and Fortune. At the mercy of a faulty time machine, Skye Ransom and Dane Fortune are forced to randomly leap through time on a wild, roller-coaster ride of danger as they try to get back to the 21st century. Each jump sends them farther away from home, but brings their hearts closer together in a bond that not even a time bender can sever. Getting back home may be the least of their worries. Warmed by Skye’s love, Dane’s soul struggles against that of the cold, unfeeling man he once was. Skye’s had enough of witnessing history first hand. Yet finally getting home could mean she’ll lose Dane forever. Worshipped by a jungle tribe, thwarted by a mad scientist, and captured by powerful Druids, Skye and Dane face the ultimate test of survival. Even if they get through it alive, will they be able to overcome their strongest enemy to date themselves? Warning: This title contains explicit sex and graphic language.


Yes, it’s book two. I have to admit that I didn’t know that and will have to look around for a copy of book one. Oh well. What do you have to do to win it? You have to tell me one little unusual thing about you, and then I’ll draw names. I’ll start just to make you feel better.

I love spaghetti!! But I tolerate hamburger pizza and hate lasagna. In fact, the only way I’ll eat lasagna is if it’s made with sausage.

Now it’s your turn. You have until 9:00 pm cst Thursday night. I’ll announce the winner Friday. Remember – it’s signed!!!!!

A little map will do ya

So I did something different on Saturday. I went to a book signing! I’d never been to one. Susie and I went – it was Michelle Miles, and she was at the Barnes & Noble at North East Mall in Hurst. I’d never been to Hurst either, at least not on purpose. LOL I got off of work at 1:00 and met Susie at my apartment and then we were off! I had printed out one of those Google driving directions things to help us, as neither one of us really knew where we were going. Have you ever used one of those? They are useless and awfully vague with their directions. But I guess we did okay since we only got lost 3 times. Hmmmm. Anyway, Michelle’s new book is A Break in Time, the second in the Ransom and Fortune Adventure series. (I have got to find a copy of the first one, oops.) So we saw Michelle, Susie bought a copy of her book and I bought two. Why? ‘Cuz I’m going to give an autographed copy of the book away. Not right now, probably Wednesday when I decide how to do it. But I digress … after getting our books, Susie and I had lunch with Ames and Lynn at someplace called Logan’s Roadhouse. Interesting place and the food was good. So was the company. I had forgotten how great it was to hang out with Ames, and how invigorating talking about writing can be. That’s what I’m hoping for with Yellow Rose – the stimulus that I get from being around other writers. It could be just the thing to kick my writing ass into gear.

So, that was my Saturday. Sunday was spent doing nothing and watching the Cowboys whip some Cleveland Browns butt! Altogether a great weekend.

How was yours?

Sleepy Time Spam

Yep, I'm half asleep while typing this. I have absolutely no idea how this will come out - I didn't sleep at all Wednesday night, worked 4 hours on Thursday. Came home and slept for 4 hours and then got up to do this. I am not totally held responsible for the outcome. *snore*

Bomb her womb from your huge cannon! (And the rockets red glare ….)
Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey split. (Duh? Where have you been?)
ONE HAS TO TAKE RISKS SOMETIME IN HIS LIFE! (Yes, and believe me, yelling at me while I’m in this mood is risky)
5 ways to make your love more passinnate. (5 ways to make my inborn love transfer more? Okay.)
Paris Hilton returned by aliens. (Unpublished writer seen chasing down UFOs in the New Mexico Desert)
Did you arouse me last night? (Nope, those were those aliens returning Paris Hilton)
Titanic dimension without much effort. (You are aware that the Titanic sank ….?)
I am searching for you. (Try the aliens)

I Won't Read, don't make me ....

Yep, got that right, for some reason I just can’t make myself read. It’s not like I don’t have anything on the shelves TO read. Far from it. I have two of Jill’s books – the last two Blazes Flashpoint and Flashback, plus Saskia Walker’s newest one that she so graciously sent me, Reckless (waving at Saskia). We won’t even mention the LOAD of books I bought a couple of months ago. Did you read that right? Two Jill Shalvis books sitting unread! I know, scary. I just can’t get into the mood, or whatever is required to read. No writing either (hey JJ, I know I owe you something, I promise its coming!!). I don’t know if it’s the summer blues, my birth sign isn’t in align with the moon, my underwear’s too tight? I don’t know, and I don’t like it. There was a time that it was hard to find me without a book in my hands. I miss reading. I miss writing. I don’t miss rithmetic though …

So, be that as it may (does anyone really know what that means?), I’ve got to get reading. What do you do to help yourself do something that you aren’t in the mood to do? Is there some trick that you have, some special incantation that you throw to the universe? Help me out folks!!

In the meantime, I received this really heartfelt email from Lis. It seems that there are these twins that really need foster care. They need TLC and a lot of attention. Can’t you find it in your hearts to help them out? I’ve signed up for Wednesday’s, I figure it’s the least I could do. And once you look into their sad faces, you too will be unable to turn them away. Please, won't you help foster them?

It's a Labor Day

Labor Day - a holiday created so that some people can labor so that other people who are not laboring can go to stores and make them labor. Right?

Labor Day used to mean a lot to me. I used to watch the Jerry Lewis Telethon way into the night and then the next morning when I woke up. I couldn't miss a minute of it. Big stars performed - I mean big names. Now? They don't even show the whole thing anymore. And stars? I caught it a couple of years ago and it was ... a telethon. No real spectacle any more. They're still raising the money, bless their hearts, but the sparkle is gone. We also used to have family gatherings on Labor Day. Up to 30 people would fill our house, food, laughter, games. On Labor Day evening I will go over to Bebo's for supper. That will be my Labor Day. It's only on holidays, no matter what holiday, that I really understand the fracturing of my family.

Speaking of my family ... my brother David informed me tonight that he will probably be going on oxygen full time now. He really only has one functioning lung because of his strokes. He has pollution caused emphysema. He also has another blocked artory in his neck that will have to be operated on. And speaking of David, read below.

I have a special concern about Gustav and his path. You see my nephew, David's step-son David (don't be confused LOL) lives on a boat in the Galveston Harbor. As the winds approach Texas I can't help but think about him. And worry. His car is broken and he can't leave. 32 years ago when my brother married David's mother, this little 5 year old boy looked up at me and said "When I grow up, I'm going to marry you." He was my first nephew, my first little love. Hey Dave? As you can see, you old Aunt is still waiting. LOL Be safe honey, be safe.

Have a safe and happy Labor Day everyone!

Summer Spam

Where have you been? (Took a break, what’s it to you?)
Not the same without you. (I’m sure you managed to make it on your own.)
Remind me God. (Not God, just Queen.)
Crazy woman goes on dog squeezing rampage. (Did you have to point out that she was crazy?)
Goodiest Abba suggestion (Mama Mia!!)
Mph mayonnaise Dixieland cartography mumble. (Forget about the mumbling map of Dixieland, what’s mph mayonnaise?)
Meet me at 1:30. (Not on your life.)
THIS IS JAMES BOND’S CHOICE. (Then let James Bond meet you.)
Thinking about you naked. (Don’t you have something better to do? Oh wait, you’re spam …)
And then … I farted. (Seeing me naked has that effect on people)
Paris Hilton swaps vagina for penis. (Why not? It was worn out anyway.)
SpongeBob named in Paris Hilton paternity lawsuit. (Not if she’s swapped her … oh, nevermind.)
Damn work! (You can say that again.)
Damn work! (I didn’t mean … Oh no, I’m about to argue with spam.)
baileystewart@baileystewart.net – Get ready for sex in 15 minutes. (Hugh?)

And since blogspot likes to put those frames on pictures and cut off the words on my LOLCats, here's just the link.

Here We Go Again

Oh, hi! Look, you showed up again. Isn’t that nice of you. What’s the matter, got nothing else to do? Evidently I don’t either. LOL You see, it’s Summer. All together now, how does Bailey feel about Summer? You’re lagging Toni. Michele, pay attention. One more time. Tori, this way sweetie. Yes, face the monitor. Brandy! Quit snickering. Melissa? Wake up dearie. Once more everyone. How does Bailey feel about Summer? There you go, that was perfect. Almost. Susan? What are you doing? No looking at LOLCats right now. Anyway, yes it’s Summer and my brain has gone on vacation along with the nekkid muses. I’m waiting for Fall. Please, sweet Fall, show your orange leaves, your crisp evenings, your splendid shedding of Summer’s green coat. Cast off the chains of Summer and run free like the wind!!!!! Oh, sorry, got carried away there. Lis honey, you’re late. Find a seat. You’ll have to catch up on your own. BTW, for being late that’ll be 3 laps around the track. Raine? I see you lurking over there. (waving) Okay, as you have noticed, the blog is still a Monday, Wednesday and Friday blog. And Friday’s will still be spam day. Keep down the cheers people. The only thing I ask of you – and this is for you lurkers – just at least say hi once a week. Two letters - H and I – a simple thing but enough to let me know that you are out there.

So it’s Summer, Tuesday was a level red ozone alert, Wednesday a level orange. Bebo and I are not amused. This isn’t good for people with asthma. It’s not really good for people without asthma. We’re all choked up about it. (har, har) But Fall really is just around the corner. School has started, NFL is in pre-season, the new Fall TV season is within eyeshot. Soon the Texas State Fair will start – my last sign of Fall. Last weekend, Bebo and her mother saw geese flying in formation heading south. Yippee!!!!!!!!! Fly babies, fly home to mama!!!!! I said – oh, hi. I forgot you were there for a moment. Sooo, Summer is nearing it’s end (oh please, oh please, oh please), and soon Bailey will be in a much better mood. You will be thankful for this too, just wait and see.

So, without further ado (not that we were ado-ing anyway), here is another of my LOLCatz. Yes Susan, see – good things do come to those who wait.

Until Friday, have fun, be safe, and be good. If you can’t be good, take notes.



moar funny pictures

ACKKKKKKK it cut off the words again. Sheesh!!!

Okay, here's the link

What was your name again?

Hi, maybe I should re-introduce myself. My name is Bailey Stewart, and I’m a writer. I write romantic comedies. At least, I think about romantic comedies. I haven’t quite gotten them transferred from the ol’ brain matter to paper. Just a little catch, but I’m sure I’ll get past that eventually. Anyway, I missed you guys! What have I been doing while I’ve been gone? Absolutely nothing. And I’ve gotten damn good at it. If doing nothing were an Olympic event, I’d take home a silver medal. Really. No, not a gold, I have been doing some things. The office is almost put together; there are only a couple of boxes in the bedroom. Miraculously and to Bebo’s amazement, I’ve actually been keeping the apartment half-way decent. I think I’ve used the vacuum more in the 5 months I’ve been here than I think I ever did in a year at the house. Yep, the vacuum cleaner has become my friend. Now, if only the iron would talk to me. I also joined a paranormal group and have been on a ghost hunt. That was fun and I’m looking forward to doing more of it. Plus, as a step towards getting the stories from the head to the page, I am on the brink of joining Yellow Rose, the Fort Worth branch of the RWA. See, I’ve been disqualified for the gold. Oh, and Aidan got married. Yes, you read it right, my oldest kitty is now a married man. And no, the men in white jackets are not waiting for me. I think. He married a nice kitty named Cissy in a beautiful MySpace ceremony at the Rock Bottom Bar and Grill. I cried. If you promise not to laugh too hard, I’ll even share pictures here. Right now the happy couple is honeymooning in Ireland. Dublin to be exact. Hey, if you have to dream, dream big.

So what about you? What have you been up to in the last couple of months? I hope everyone has been having a great summer. I know that Michele and Dru have joined Facebook. Marty got married. And …. Well hey, fill me in!!

Oh wait!! I have been doing something else. I've been making my own LOLCatz. Obviously, you don't have to use your own pictures, since this isn't one of my cats. They have their own picture files you can choose from. This is one of my favorites that I've made.




HEY!!! BLOGGER CUT OFF THE WORDS!!!!! AWWWWWWW.
You gotta go here to see it properly.
moar funny pictures

Announcement

The Long and Writing Road will be returning on Monday, August 25!!!!


Thanks for allowing me this break. I needed it!! Hope to see you all here. And yes, I have been collecting spam while I've been gone. :)

A Break

It’s become quite evident that if I don’t go blogging, people aren’t going to come here. And yet, at the moment, I have no urge to go blogging. I don’t know what it is – blogging burnout? I used to go to so many blogs it would take hours to do my list. I got tired. Shoot, I’ve gotten tired of writing my own blog. So I guess I’m going to take a little sabbatical here. Maybe when I start the job hunt, interview process or something, I’ll have something to write about. Right now, it’s just the heat and me. Nothing else to talk about. I don’t have out-laws to gripe about, children to talk about, or anything else of any interest to anyone. I don’t know how long I’ll be gone, I’ll let you know when I’m back. Thanks to those of you who have stuck with me. I promise, I will return.

Love to you all.

YouTube is my friend

I received a couple of things this last week that I thought you would enjoy.

In this first one, this is what the cat does EVERY time they watch boxing.




And this next one - well, it really moved me. Get a hankie ready ...

I Hate my Internet Spam

Yep, I'm having problems with the internet again. I've spent the day here at Bebo's trying to get all my bills paid, internet stuff done, reviews written and posted, and spam written in case I don't get back before Friday. So here it is Wednesday and I'm posting Spam. Not that you'll see it before Friday anyway, since blogster has this great "post it ahead of time" feature where I can set it up to post early Friday morning. I know, devious of me. Anyway, here's the spam. Don't forget to go over to Isn't It Romantic for my new review. Ciao everyone!

Update your penis. (What? To penis 2.0?)
Greetings, I have learned an interesting thing. (That Microsoft will upgrade your penis?)
Regain your attractiveness as a man. (I was a man?)
You look really stupid baileystewart. (As a man, yes I do.)
Don’t warry. (Warry? Is that more than wary? I would be warry of me as a man.)
How do these guys do it? (They’re born with it?)
These pills really make you huge. (No thanks, I have chocolate for that.)
Your neighbors lost their alarm clock. (You have got to be kidding! Don’t look at me, where would I put them?)
Ladies and Gentlemen’s please welcome her majesty Pharmacy. (In her jewel encrusted shower cap, carrying her gold toilet plunger scepter.)

Oh, and here's a picture of Bubba to hold you over.





UPDATE: INTERNET SUDDENLY CAME ON LAST NIGHT WITHOUT ANY EFFORT FROM ME, SO THERE MUST HAVE BEEN SOMETHING WRONG WITH THE PROVIDER

11 Reasons we love kids

1) NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, 'Mom, that lady isn't wearing a seat belt!'

2) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, 'The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents.'

3) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. 'Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle.'

4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, 'What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?'

5) POLICE # 1
While taking a routine vandalism report at an elementary school, I was interrupted by a little girl about 6 years old. Looking up and down at my uniform, she asked, 'Are you a cop?' 'Yes,' I answered and continued writing the report. My mother said if I ever needed help I should ask the police. Is that right?' 'Yes, that's right,' I told her. 'Well, then,' she said as she extended her foot toward me, 'would you please tie my shoe?'

6) POLICE # 2
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me. 'Is that a dog you got back there?' he asked. 'It sure is,' I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, 'What'd he do?'

7) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass.. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, 'The tooth fairy will never believe this!'

8) DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, 'Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit.' 'And why not, darling?' he asked. 'You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning.'

9) DEATH
While walking along the sidewalk in front of his church, our minister heard the intoning of a prayer that nearly made his collar wilt. Apparently, his 5-year-old son and his playmates had found a dead robin. Feeling that proper burial should be performed, they had secured a small box and cotton batting, then dug a hole and made ready for the disposal of the deceased. The minister's son was chosen to say the appropriate prayers and with sonorous dignity intoned his version of what he thought his father always said: 'Glory be unto the Father, and unto the Son, and into the hole he goooes.' (I want this line used at my funeral!)

10) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. 'I'm just wasting my time,' she said to her mother. 'I can't read, I can't write, and they won't let me talk!'

11) BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family Bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. 'Mama, look what I found,' the boy called out.

'What have you got there, dear?'

With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, 'I think it's Adam's underwear!'

Memorial Day

imikimi - Customize Your World

1943 Guide to Hiring Women

The Following is an excerpt from the July 1943 issue of Transportation Magazine. The was written for male supervisors of women in the work force during WWII.




Eleven Tips on Getting More Efficiency Out of Women Employees: There’s no longer any question whether transit companies should hire women for jobs formerly held by men. The draft and manpower shortage has settled that point. The important things now are to select the most efficient women available and how to use them to the best advantage.




Here are eleven helpful tips on the subject from Western Properties.




1. Pick young married women. They usually have more of a sense of responsibility than their unmarried sisters, they’re less likely to be flirtatious, they need to work or they wouldn’t be doing it, they still have the pep and interest to work hard to deal with the public efficiently.


2. When you have to use older women, try to get ones who have worked outside the home at some time in their lives. Older women who have never contacted the public have a hard time adapting themselves and are inclined to be cantankerous and fussy. It’s always well to impress upon older women the importance of friendliness and courtesy.


3. General experience indicates that “husky” girls – those who are just a little on the heavy side – are more even tempered and efficient than their underweight sisters.


4. Retain a physician to give each woman you hire a special physical examination – one covering female conditions. This step not only protects the property against the possibilities of lawsuit, but reveals whether the employee-to-be has any female weakness which would make her mentally or physically unfit for the job.


5. Stress at the outset the importance of time the fact that a minute or two lost here and there makes serious inroads on schedules. Until this point is gotten across, service is likely to be slowed up.


6. Give the female employee a definite day-long schedule of duties so that they’ll keep busy without bothering the management for instructions every few minutes. Numerous properties say that women make excellent workers when they have their jobs cut out for them, but that they lack initiative in finding work themselves.


7. Whenever possible, let the inside employee change from one job to another at some time during the day. Women are inclined to be less nervous and happier with change.


8. Give every girl an adequate number of rest periods during the day. You have to make allowances for feminine psychology. A girl has more confidence and is more efficient if she can keep her hair tidied, apply fresh lipstick and wash her hands several times a day.


9. Be tactful when issuing instructions or making criticisms. Women are often sensitive; they can’t shrug off harsh words they way men do. Never ridicule a woman – it breaks her spirit and cuts off her efficiency.


10. Be reasonably considerate about using strong language around women. Even though a girl’s husband or father may swear vociferously, she’ll grow to dislike a place of business where she hears too much of this.


11. Get enough size variety in operator’s uniforms so that each girl can have a proper fit. This point can’t be stressed too much in keeping women happy.




I know, it’s not spam, but my cousin sent me this and I just loved it and didn’t want to wait until Monday to post it. Hope everyone has a great weekend.

Dusty Undies

One evening a husband, thinking he was being funny, said to his wife


'Perhaps we should start washing your clothes in Slim Fast. Maybe it would take a few inches off of your butt!!'


His wife was not amused, and decided that she simply couldn't let such a comment go unrewarded.


The next morning the husband took a pair of underwear out of his drawer.


'What the Heck is this??' he said to himself as a little 'dust' cloud appeared when he shook them out.


'April,' he hollered into the bathroom, 'Why did you put talcum powder in my underwear?'


She replied with a snicker...'It's not talcum powder......It's 'Miracle Grow'.'

Deja Vu all over again

Well I was trying to figure out a title for tonight’s blog and thought of “This and That” and then I realized I had already used it, so it would be like “Déjà vu all over again”. So that’s where the post title came from.

The only thing I have to add about the apartment is the chimes that I bought at Scarborough Faire. I tried to take a picture of them the day that I shot the patio, but they didn’t show up at all against the cloudy sky, so I had to wait until a sunny day. Even then, they still don’t show up well unless you click and enlarge the picture. The colors aren’t right – I don’t know why the camera isn’t displaying them right. They are leaves and they are a rusty color and a light green. Very pretty and the sound they make is beautiful.

Oh, wait, I do have this wall between the bedroom and bathroom. This is my tribute to dad. And yes, that is a real December 8, 1941 newspaper in that frame.





I had a bit of disconcerting news this weekend. My Aunt Alice was in the hospital. It seems she’ll be okay, but it still scared me. Mom was the first on her side to pass away, and the first death since her mother died in 1980. We’ve been very lucky there. In my lifetime we’ve lost my grandparents and an aunt-in-law, uncle-in-law, and then mom. That’s it. On dad’s side there’s the grandparents, dad, two of his brothers, three of his sisters, and six in-laws. Plus two cousins. So you see how unnerved I became to have first my mother’s brother in the hospital a couple of weeks ago, my aunt, and then to find out today that the oldest was in the hospital too. Confused yet? Anyway, they’re all getting up there and it’s only a matter of time before mom’s side begins to drop, for loss of another way to phrase it. It was the elders that have kept the family together, and as they die, or move away, it’s like we’re all “breaking” up. We no longer have family get-togethers like we did when I was growing up. We probably never will. Dad had 2 brothers and 1 sister living here when he died. Now one of the brothers has moved back to Iowa to live with his daughter, and his sister is moving to Alaska to live with her daughter. That just leaves my Uncle Kenny, and he doesn’t live in town – I haven’t seen him since 2006. In fact, I’ve hardly seen any of my extended family since mother died. And except for my Aunt Alice and one cousin, mother’s family doesn’t live here. I guess I’m just feeling a bit nostalgic this weekend. You see, I woke up Sunday morning with the realization that it was Howard’s birthday. It wasn’t anything I thought about, I just knew when I woke up without thinking about the date. Happy Birthday Howard. He would have been 56. Bebo and I talked about him for a little bit today. The date hadn’t gotten past her either. I saw my niece in March, which was the first time I’d seen her since 2006. And my nephews? Haven’t seen them since mom died either. It doesn’t bother me unless a holiday is coming up. And next weekend is Memorial Day. We got together every Memorial Day to celebrate both Howard’s and my dad’s birthdays (May 31). And now it’s just another day. They’re all pretty much just another day.

Egads, I’m so morose. Excuse me. Let’s end this with something funny, okay?

But do they bloom??? I wonder if they come in different colors? I wonder about the fragrance?I wonder if it would help to put those preservative packets in the water? I wonder if they bloom?I wonder whether they would look better on the kitchen table or in the entry? I wonder if they're cheaper by the dozen?I wonder if they come in long-stemmed?

Captured at 115th and Allisonville Rd. in Fishers (Indianapolis). The sign is real and was up for two hours before someone stopped and told them how to spell PE O NI ES

Spam on a Stick

We caught you naked in shower baileystewart. (Norman? Norman Bates, is that you?)
Video with a naked celebrity Gallery for baileystewart. (Oooh, Hugh, George, Orlando, Johnny, Matthew, …)
World of clocks. (Let me guess, they have a little dirt on them?)
Good afternoon, I have a good software. (Damn! I was looking for bad software!)
hello from denise (Um, Dennie, have you forgotten your capitals?)
Holy moly, that’s huge. (I know, for a writer that’s a big one.)
your payment didn’t succeed, so your ads have been suspended. (You mean those “Hugh Look at Me!” billboards? Sheesh!)
I went to the panty shop! (You’re much too excited about that.)
Some men won’t learn. (Well, you can’t teach an old dog …)

And Even More

Here's my front hall. That's my pewter spoon collection, and on both sides of it are Irish pictures, of course.

This is the view of the kitchen from the living room.

Here's one side of my kitchen

Here's the other. Like we said, it's small. That's the washer and dryer area in the back.

And here is the bathroom in all of it's glory. Well, most of it's glory. I didn't think you wanted a picture of the toilet itself. LOL

This is the end of the bathroom. Yes, the toilet is to the left. This is the curtain that Bebo got me for a house warming.

Here's a close up? I was trying to get the curtain rings. Maybe if you click it will be larger. Anyway, they match the curtain.

Okay Susan, here's my patio.

This is in my kitchen. It belonged to my maternal grandmother, so it's special to me.

This is also in the kitchen, above the archway to the laundry area. This is the plaque that I talked about earlier, the one that we found in my mother's closet tucked in the back of the shelves. It was my mother's last gift to me.

For Susan

The Living Room





The picture above the fireplace is a family tree that my cousin drew in charcoal, with the frame made by my uncle. Actually, the cousin and uncle are on my dad's side, but the tree is my mother's side. That's Irish stuff on the mantle. I don't have ceiling fans, so I have to have standing fans, kinda spoils the decor. LOL



This is a close-up of the little table in the corner. It's my little bit of nostalgia.



My entertainment center. I have one more picture to frame and get hung, then it's finished.

My big ol' chair (with Aidan in it) and my new couch. The door at the end goes out to the patio.

That's it so far. I'll get the kitchen and the bedroom for Wednesday. Does this satisfy you for a bit? Oh, if you click on the picture, you get a close-up view.

Spam on the Go

Good afternoon. (It's morning you moron)
What are you up to? (Oh, about 5'3")
Nobody has ever presented you with such a New Year's gift. (New Year's already? Where did the year go?)
Video with a naked celebrity Gallery for baileystewart. (There's only one celebrity I would like to see naked. But that will never happen)
Improbably things happen too. (Thank you Mr. Jiminy Cricket)
You won't believe! It's incredible! (From spam? Nothing would surprise me.)
You should be satisfied with your penis. (Yeah, well, I was hoping that the rest of him would be here too.)
That's a Teenie Weenie! (Then obviously it isn't his ...)

Friday is just another day, or Thank God it's NOT Friday!

What? No pictures? Well, you see, it's kinda like this. The apartment didn't get ready this weekend. I know, I know. You see, the best made plans and so forth. I have three large boxes to unpack and a desk to de-clutter. I could have done that on Friday, the day I'd planned to have it done, but my Friday didn't go exactly as planned. The day started well enough, no harbinger rang out to warn me of the trouble ahead. And it was trouble. With a capitol "T". BAck in October of '06 was the last time that the hide-a-bed was used, by Glenice as a matter of fact. Even though she was the last to sleep on it, I knew she'd want fresh sheets. I opened the couch to take the old ones off and was met with a horrendous smell. Reek was more like it. And the covers were stuck to the metal frame. What the hell? I pried the blanket loose and the smell got worse. It was everywhere. I managed to get the sheets and blanket loose and off, then proceeded to pull the mattress out to the patio, where I sprayed it with some freshening stuff. I threw the blankets and sheets into the washing machine and prayed that they'd get clean. Then I turned my attention to the couch. I couldn't help it. You could smell it all through the apartment. What had happened? It looked like it had somehow gotten wet. I figure that BooBear, in his perpetual quest for a clean litter box, had somehow peed down the back of the cushions. Yet this smell was not evident UNTIL I opened the hide-a-bed. I sprayed down the mattress support and the couch. Then I went to work on the bar with a brillo pad to see if I could get the rust (or what I thought was rust) off of there. By this time the washing machine had gone into the final spin cycle and the thing became over balanced. I tried to fix it, but the blanket and stuff wouldn't cooperate. So I did what I used to do at home, just leaned on it until the cycle was through. Took the stuff out and threw it in the dryer, then loaded the washing machine with towels and bath rugs. Went back to work on the bed, taking the cushions outside and spraying them, spraying the mattress again for good measure. Came back into the house, did a few things and then went to put some trash away in the kitchen. The kitchen floor was flooded. Yeah, you heard me. Flooded. Water pouring out from beneath the washing machine. It took 4 1/2 big rolls of paper towels to wipe it up. Luckily the load was done. Are you with me so far? Yeah, thought so. It was at this time that I thought that a daquiri was in order. The outcome? The couch had to be thrown out - loaded with fungus and mold. Replacement luckily found by accident at a garage sale for $40. With a $70 slipcover, it was taken care of. The washer? Glenice pulled it out a bit, climbed up and looked behind and re-connected the hose that had come loose when the washer had gone into it's shimmying (sp?) overload dance. That was my Friday. May it never come again.

Hey

Can't you see I'm busy here? Oh, you can't? Well, I am. Glenice and I are about to watch Van Helsing because we're both feeling the need for Hugh. So, to keep you occupied here's another YouTube laugh (I'll be back on Wednesday). Have fun!!

OMG Spam

Once again, I almost forgot to blog. Sheesh. Here at the last minute is Friday's spam. Enjoy, and have a great weekend. I know I will because Glenice arrives Friday night!!! WhooHoo!!!!!

I bet you’ve never seen anything like this! (You’d be surprised)
Land of strong mans. (You’re right, I’ve never seen that. Do they book weekend rooms?)
We caught you naked baileystewart. (Lucky you.)
There’s a Party in My Pants! (And you’re worried about me being naked?)
Here comes the smears. (Oh don’t worry. Everything I say is true.)
Attract the mate of your dreams. (Does he come from the Land of strong mans?)
Up to you. I know. (It’s always up to me. Where have you been?)
Don’t you agree to be sick! (I’m not the one that caught me naked.)
HiramBigDick. (Kimosabe)

Happy Birthday Aidan

imikimi - Customize Your World