Monday, December 18, 2006

More Ways to Confuse Santa Claus

- Instead of milk and cookies, leave him a salad, and a note explaining that you think he could stand to lose a few pounds.
- While he's in the house, go find his sleigh and write him a speeding ticket.
- Leave him a note, explaining that you've gone away for the holidays. Ask if he would mind watering your plants.
- While he's in the house, replace all his reindeer with exact replicas. Then wait and see what happens when he tries to get them to fly.
- Keep an angry bull in your living room. If you think a bull goes crazy when he sees a little red cape, wait until he sees that big, red Santa suit!
- Build an army of mean-looking snowmen on the roof, holding signs that say "We hate Christmas," and "Go away Santa"
- Leave a note by the telephone, telling Santa that Mrs. Claus called and wanted to remind him to pick up some milk and a loaf of bread on his way home.
- Set a bear trap at the bottom of the chimney. Wait for Santa to get caught in it, and then explain that you're sorry, but from a distance, he looked like a bear.
- While he's in the house, find the sleigh and sit in it. As soon as he comes back and sees you, tell him that he shouldn't have missed that last payment, and take off.

Jill's giving away an ARC of her upcoming release Smart and Sexy (April 07). The contest goes until the 22nd.

Chocolate Peanut Butter Squares

1 1/2 cups powdered sugar
1 1/2 cups creamy peanut butter
1 1/2 teaspoons vanilla
1 (18-oz) pkg. Chocolate Chip Cookie dough

1. Heat oven to 350. In medium bowl, combine powdered sugar, peanut butter and vanilla; mix well.
2. Remove cookie dough from wrapper. With floured fingers, press half of dough in bottom of ungreased 8 or 9-inch square pan. Press peanut butter mixture evenly over dough. Crumble and sprinkle remaining half of cookie dough over peanut butter mixture. Carefully spread as evenly as possible.
3. Bake for 30 to 35 minutes or until golden brown and firm to the touch. Cool 30 minutes. Refrigerate 1 hour or until chilled. Cut into bars. Serve chilled or at room temperature.

Tonight's movie:

Miracle On 34th Street (original and in black and white)

Oh, and Happy 88th Birthday Uncle Bill!!!!


Scott said...

I love Miracle on 34th street with cute-as-a-button Natalie Wood.

Sorry I haven't been around much, even about football. After that shelacking we took from New Orleans, who turn around and get squelched by the Redskins, I've vowed to stay away from football shows like Inside the NFL and from all the websites I've read daily. I need to get some writing done.

I'll try to post later.

Be well. And despite my new attitude, I couldn't help but watch and be excited about Saturdays game. But we have some problems on D.

Meretta said...

ROFLOL. I love these "how to confuse Santa" tricks.

Thanks for sharing, Bailey!

Rene said...

Oh, poor Santa. I gave your earlier one to my son. Thought he was going to bust a gut. I'll give him this one too.

Toni Anderson said...

Happy Birthday Uncle Bill--how was the party?

Like the Santa tricks. poor Santa :)

Susan said...

When you wake up Christmas morning and find coal in your stocking it'll be because of the "how to confuse Santa" tricks! ;)

Thanks for the reminder of Miracle On 34th Street. I love it!

Chocolate Peanut Butter Squares sound yummy. I'm printing it out for my mom.

Yeah Cowboys! Did you have a good time at the party?

Melissa Marsh said...

OOOOH, those cookies sound divine!

Kelley said...

LOL. Those are funny.

christa said...

No wonder Jill has 97 comments. Maybe by the end of day she'll have 100 comments and birthday sishes. Maybe I'll go back over there and help it along.

Tori Lennox said...

Boy, you must really be needing some coal 'cause you're sure to get lots of it with all those tricks. *g*

Susie said...

Speaking of coal, we watched Santa Clause 2 last night, too funny.

Thanks for the contest notice at Jill's, I've thrown my name into the hat.

Brandy said...

Happy Birthday Uncle Bill!!!!

The peanut butter squares sound delicious!

Loving the bull one!!! You are going to get a stern talking to from Santa this year.

Marty said...

I'm BACK! And just in time for chocolate and peanut butter!

Daisy Dexter Dobbs said...

Mmmm, I’ve been drooling over all the scrumptious recipes you’ve been posting, Bailey. Yum! The chocolate peanut butter squares sound fabulous (LOVE that combination!)--and so quick and easy!

I’ve never read a Jill Shalvis book but after having read that heartfelt tribute you wrote for her birthday I’m definitely going to have to check out her work. :-)

Carol said...

The original Miracle On 34th Street is one of my favorite Christmas movies! I always liked Natalie Wood and I feel bad about what happened to her.

Happy Birthday, Uncle Bill!

catslady said...

We just watched our favorite - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. Miracle unfortunately is on against football - bah humbug.

Dru said...

I love these, especially the one about leaving a note by the phone.

My Christmas holiday is not complete if I don't see the original B&w version of Miracle on 34th Street.

Michele said...

OOoh, I just bought National Lampoons Christmas Vacation for DH's present. Guess it's a good one?

You have an Uncle Bill? Happy B-day to him.

However, in my head, sick that it is, I hear ...Oh Noooo, It's...Uncle Biiilll!

Remember SNL from the 80's? I thought Mr. Bill was such a hoot.

You know, there's a LOT of thought going into tricking Santa. Where do you get fake reindeer anyway. And how do you know whether or not Rudolph is going to be pulling that sleigh?

Now horses .... horses I could get you -two life sized Morgans. There standing proud and tall in an MD's front lawn
Why? I have no idea, but they certainly are attention grabbers.
I saw them today and was astounded.
I've heard of flamingos, lawn gnomes and bird feeders, but life sized horses?
He at LEAST could have put wreaths on the beasts ..geesh.