Sunday, December 24, 2006

A Parent's Night Before Christmas

I didn't write this, it's a repeat from last year, but I figured it was worth the re-run.

'Twas the night before Christmas when all through the house
I searched for the tools to hand to my spouse.
Instructions were studied and we were inspired,
In hopes we could manage "Some Assembly Required.

"The children were quiet (not asleep) in their beds,
While Dad and I faced the evening with dread: A kitchen, two bikes, Barbie's town house to boot!
And, thanks to Grandpa, a train with a toot!

We opened the boxes, my heart skipped a beat....
Let no parts be missing or parts incomplete!
Too late for last-minute returns or replacement;
If we can't get it right, it goes in the basement!

When what to my worrying eyes should appear,
But 50 sheets of directions, concise, but not clear,
With each part numbered and every slot named,
So if we failed, only we could be blamed.

More rapid than eagles the parts then fell out,
All over the carpet they were scattered about.
"Now bolt it! Now twist it! Attach it right there!
Slide on the seats, and staple the stair!
Hammer the shelves, and nail to the stand.
"Honey," said hubby, "you just glued my hand.

"And then in a twinkling, I knew for a fact
That all the toy dealers had indeed made a pact
To keep parents busy all Christmas Eve night
With "assembly required" till morning's first light.

We spoke not a word, but kept bent at our work,
Till our eyes, they went bleary; our fingers all hurt.
The coffee went cold and the night, it wore thin
Before we attached the last rod and last pin.

Then laying the tools away in the chest,
We fell into bed for a well-deserved rest.
But I said to my husband just before I passed out,
"This will be the best Christmas, without any doubt.

Tomorrow we'll cheer, let the holiday ring,
And not have to run to the store for a thing!
We did it! We did it! The toys are all set
For the perfect, most perfect, Christmas, I bet!

"Then off to dreamland and sweet repose I gratefully went,T
hough I suppose there's something to say for those self-deluded...
I'd forgotten that batteries are never included!

Tonight's Movie: A Christmas Carol (1938 Reginal Owen version. I just love Gene Lockhart - some of you may remember him as the judge in the original Miracle on 34th Street)


christa said...

Unfortunatly most of the presents nowadys we have to open to make sure they are all ready. I know with my son's it had to be opened and charged.
Is there football on tomorrow?(Sunday)
I just finished a wonderful Christmas book called There's Something About Christmas by Debbie Macomber about fruitcake.

Brandy said...

Ah, they forgot batteries required. It would be nice to have batteries included just once!!
Oooh, I read that book by Debbie Macomber. Tomorrow is going to be whirlwind. If I don't get a chance to say it "Merry Christmas Eve!"

Toni Anderson said...

I have more batteries than Walmart. Bring it on ;)

Happy Christmas
And who's the birthday girl tomorrow ???

Bailey Stewart said...

I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about ...

catslady said...

Lol that was cute and at least I no longer have to worry about putting toys together. I've spent most of the day wrapping though.

Joely Sue Burkhart said...

We lucked out and don't really have much to put together at all this year. *whew* MERRY CHRISTMAS, Bailey! We're watching It's A Wonderful Life.