Sunday, November 12, 2006

Anybody got a net?

Why isn’t she writing today.

It’s Sunday. That’s when she watches football.

I never could understand that game.

Why not? It’s easy.

I can’t remember what all of the positions are and what they do.

I’ll help you. Take the Quarterback.

I didn’t give you a quarter.

What?

You said to take the quarter back. How can I take something back you’ve never given me?

That’s the name of the position. The leader of the team. He’s called the quarterback, or QB for short.

Isn’t that the name of a men’s magazine?

No junior wit, that’s GQ.

I get them mixed up.

That’s not the only thing. Okay, let’s leave positions behind and go on to the game. There are four quarters.

Where?

In the game stupid.

There are four quarters in a game, but only one is a back?

No, there are a lot of backs, half-back, running back.

Running back to where? Where they left the quarter?

There’s no money in the game.

Then why play it?

The players get money …

I knew someone did.

Can we get back to football?

Sure, go ahead, it’s your time.

There are four quarters OR SECTIONS of a game.

Don’t need to yell.

Each quarter takes fifteen minutes to play.

Then how come a game can last for over 3 hours? Even I can figure out that’s 1 hour.

Because there are stops, and replays …

Couldn’t they play it right the first time?

I’m ignoring you.

What else is new?

Commercials …

Told you someone was making money.

Half-time, time-outs …

Was someone naughty?

There’s a lot of things involved in the game that takes time.

Why don’t they just get down to playing the game and get it over with.

Speaking of downs, you get four.

I do?

No, the team does. The defense has to stop the offense from making a score.

How do they do that?

Some teams use a nickel defense.

Now you’re back to money again.

Would you forget about money.

You’re the one who keeps bringing it up.

… let’s talk about offense.

Didn’t do it.

Didn’t do what?

Offend anyone.

I wouldn’t count on that.

Are you done yet?

Why do I even bother. Yes, we’re done.

So Bailey isn’t going to write today because she’s watching foosball.

Football.

Whatever.

That’s not all. She has some cleaning up to do. Things to pack away still. She’s going to hang a couple of pictures in her bedroom so that she can take a picture …

Why is she going to hang them before she takes them?

No nipple nose, she’s going to take a picture with a camera.

I find my hands work better.

For what?

Taking things.

She’s going to take a photograph of her room for the blog.

Oh, I get it.

You’re going to get it all right.

Then she’ll write and make us real?

Yep, just like the Blue Fairy.

Hey! I know the Blue Fairy and Bailey is no Blue Fairy. Where are you going?

To jump off a bridge.

Can I go too?

Only if you jump first.

13 comments:

catslady said...

Oh, the voices are definitely my favorite!!! Had to ask my husband what a nickel defense was roflmao.
Looking forward to the pic. (and I'm first hahahahahaha)

Bailey Stewart said...

Um, looks like you're going to be the only one. Where is everybody?

Susan said...

Oh, the voices could have been my mom and dad! LOL

Marty said...

I had to flip a coin on which post to comment on. Since I had nothing good to say about the Panthers, it's probably good that it landed on 'heads'. Can't wait to see the pic!

Brandy said...

Your voices are hilarious! I too, want to see a picture of your new room!

Bailey Stewart said...

Pictures are taken. Odd thing happened too, but I'll tell you tomorrow.

Brandy said...

You mean we have to wait? You leave us with and an odd thing happened....., and we have to wait?

Bailey Stewart said...

Na-nana-noo-noo.

Meretta said...

I love the voices! Enjoy the game, Bailey. Hope the voices don't bother you too much!

Can't wait to hear about the odd thing!

Brandy said...

Stinker!

Sandy J said...

ROTFL!!!!! I really got into the conversation. Made me want to push her off the cliff! LOL!

Carol said...

ROFLMAO That is hilarious!

ruby55 said...

LOL, I needed that since, among other things, my back is killing me.

One thing about Canadian football: it does take less time to play even though we have as many quarters and a longer field, plus 12 guys per team. A game here is long if it's 2 and a half hours. But we have only 3 tries at a down and that makes for much more action. I wonder how my Bombers made out. The Grey Cup is being played in Winnipeg this year, Bomber home territory.

And how did the Cowboys do? Hope they won. I guess I should look up both games.

I got really tired of watching football with my mother. She'd ask 20,000 questions about who was who on the field while I was trying to follow the game.