I Wonder.........
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say,"I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes out of it's rear"
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme stuff, why didn't he just buy dinner?
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?
Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . . ..
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
EDIT:
Happy Birthday Saskia!!!!!!!!!!!!
20 comments:
Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?
Nope.
I've tried it.
Is Disney world the only.......
Yes! Yes it is. A total money trap, that is.
And how sad that I just noticed the Twinkle, Twinkle, Alphabet song thing.
I had to stop singing too (I was checking). And I loved the one about the dog sticking his head out the car window.
I was singing too. I still am. I'm going to have that tune in my head for hours now. Gee, thanks. :o)
You HAD to ask??? Cool, I love tests........
Who was the first person to look at a cow and say,"I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"
Actually, that's easy. Humans and cows are mammals. If humans breast feed and calfs teat feed, ergo, milk is in that udder. Humans dry up faster than cows. Drink away!
Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes out of it's rear"
"If weasels, foxes and other animals are observed snathing eggs and eating them, humans being the observant and adaptable creatures we are, would investigate. We ARE a curious race...
Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?
Quick bread crumbs when you realize you have none. Burn it, drop it into melted butter than plop onto whatever casserole needs it (it works)
Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?
Shattering Glass in the colder temps
If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?
Same as when people crack their knuckles of their fingers or toes, no one cares, yet they do it anyway - we just have to remind them that WE DON"T CARE
If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat?
He wasn't a carpenter
If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme stuff, why didn't he just buy dinner?
Restaurants don't accept Fool's Gold
If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?
Infantile minds that couldn't think of a better name - But is Olive Oil made from Popeye's Girlfriend???
If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?
Yep -Zealot Morons
Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse?
No contest - He did what Pinky and the Brain only DREAM of - world domination!
Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?
Sure, it's still a jumbled up mess!
Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?
You Bet, I would too! No one, even a dog, wants to smell extreme halitosis! He's gotta clean out his nostrils anyway he can...
Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster? Depends...how many elevator buttons can I push?
So, did I pass the test? How many did I get right?
OMG Michele - that was so FUNNY!
what a hoot Bailey - thanks for posting this - you seem to have a knack for making me laugh out loud and cause my daughter to look at me like I'm insane.
Awww, thanks sweetie! Hugs! And the funnies were superb, thanks for sharing.
I was also singing and that's not a good thing if you're in the same room with me! Thanks for the laughs.
Michele - Loved your post! lol
Happy Birthday Saskia! And now you can sing the alphabet while people sing to you! Hope you have a great day!
Thanks for the laughs, Bailey.
Uh. Except that it's twinkle, twinkle little star that's similar to the alpahbet and not Happy Birthday. I bet you think there's a lot of morality in my house, huh? ;)
Plus, I can't spell.
sigh.
I need more coffee!!!
That was great Bailey and Michele! lol
I think everyone who read this started singing! lol
Those are great, Bailey!
*ggg*
It's almost like spam friday lol. (notice I said almost)
Happy Birthday Saskia!
The elevator button thing strikes a chord with me too but not for elevators. For me, it's the crosswalk.
Everybody usually has to ding, ding, ding until the light finally lets us cross. Since I can often hear that from my apartment and certainly when I'm waiting, it gets on my nerves so much I could literally scream. Now I know I'm supersensitive to noise, but it doesn't win the guys any points trying to make it hurry. Cheesh.
roflmao
Oops, Saskia. Have a really happy and fun birthday and many more.
I think I'm missing someone's birthday today, too. I'll find out once I rediscover my birthday calendar.
Hahaha...now I'm wondering about the cow thing too.
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