Monday, September 04, 2006

Labor Day ... and a Contest Too

In honor of Labor Day, here's a salute to our workforce:

These individual quotes were reportedly taken from actual employee performance evaluations throughout the U.S. Hopefully, none of us will be seeing similar ones on ours.
- His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity.
- I would not allow this employee to breed.
- Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.
- This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
- He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
- This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
- This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better.
- Gates are down, lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming.
- Has two brains: one is lost and the other is out looking for it.
- If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
- It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.
- Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled.
- Takes him 1.5 hours to watch 60 Minutes.
- He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier.
- I would like to go hunting with him sometime.
- He's been working with glue too much.
- He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room.
- When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell.
- If you see two people talking, and one looks bored, he's the other one.
- Donated his brain to science before he was done using it.


If you'd like to win a copy of Bad Boys Southern Style by Joann Ross, E.C. Sheedy and Jill Shalvis, just go to the comments and say "I want a bad boy". Contest ends 9:00p.m. central Thursday night (September 7). Mom will draw a name and the winner will be announced on Friday.

38 comments:

Brandy said...

These are hilarious. Have to say though, when DH writes up his employee evaluations, they are very, um, politic. His company requires it.

Lis said...

Ahem, I Want A Bad Boy :o)

lol on these, i like the first one the best

Jordan Summers said...

***- If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week.
- It's hard to believe that he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm.
- Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled.***

These are my favorite by far. OMG!!! I'm still laughing.

Anonymous said...

These are great, lol!! ;-D

Diane said...

"I want a bad boy."

Actually, I think I finally have one ... :o)

Happy Labor Day.

Siobhan said...

These are very funny. BTW Labour day is 1st May in Europe. Strange ... Have a happy one!

Michele said...

Ooh, yea!
Gimme-gimme! "I want a bad boy".

But the boy better be a MAN! I've got two 'boys' who drive me nuts now! LOL

Just kidding. Love'em to pieces- my eldest is coming home from his first sleep over today. Three nights at his aunts in NH!! He was so brave! And he behaved?!

His little bro was crushed. First night was SO hard. AFter 6 1/2 years always together, being apart for the first time was hard on the tyke.

Re: the list - These are wonderfully funny!
Too many good ones to pinpoint. Have to say, you find the coolest things!

Anonymous said...

I want a bad boy!

Thanks-

Kristie

Unknown said...

"I want a bad boy"

Well, don't we all?

These are so funny. Another great post.

Happy Labor Day!

Christa said...

I think I worked with some of those people.
I wonder if some of them are about the same employees.

Carol M said...

I want a bad boy.

These are wonderful! lol

Sandy J said...

How hysterical!

"I want a bad boy"

Cheryl said...

I want a bad boy.

Those quotes were too funny.

Anonymous said...

I want a bad boy!

His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity.

This one really tickles me! *g*

Anonymous said...

Loved the list, too funny! Hope you have a nice day!

"I want a bad boy"

Anonymous said...

Those are great.
I love the commercial "I work with a bunch of monkeys!" I understood that one so well!

Judy F said...

I want a bad boy....

Anonymous said...

I want a bad boy....hehe who doesn't!!

Thanks!!

Rashmi said...

I want a bad boy! Oh, I so do!!

Bailey Stewart said...

Anonymous - and you are ...? Don't be embarrassed, you're not the first one to forget to leave a name.

Wolfy said...

I want a bad boy

And I love that post. Thanks again for the smiles.

Cryna

Anonymous said...

I want a bad boy!!

Thanks!!

ButterflyLane said...

I want a bad boy!

I think I've worked with most of these people. Actually, I think I might be related to some of them!

Anonymous said...

"I want a bad boy" :-D

Denise McDonald said...

LOL - My fave - Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargled.


I know a person or two like that...

Kelley Nyrae said...

You always find the funniest stuff!!

catslady said...

"I Want a Bad Boy" - well at least that one hahaha.

Blog was really funny - thanks :)

Anonymous said...

These are hysterical!

I want a bad boy, too!

tajt10

Christa said...

I was checking some things out on the internet and went to the Brava site, did you see they have Texas Bad Boys?

Anonymous said...

"I want a bad boy"

Happy Labor Day everyone!:)

Rene said...

I want a bad boy...if he'll take out the trash.

I've seen these before, aren't they a hoot?

Anonymous said...

"I want a bad boy."

More to come.

CrystalGB said...

I want a bad boy! :)

Meretta said...

ROFLOL. Too funny, Bailey. I'm tucking this one away for when DH has to do evaluations at work.

Jacqueline Hutchinson said...

ahay - Bailey - I have missed your funny posts! What a HOOT to come back to! Thank you for the giggle.

Anonymous said...

i want a bad boy

I've seen some of those "evaluations" before. They're a hoot.

Mariee said...

I want a bad boy! :)

Thanks,

Unknown said...

Those evaluations are too funny!

Oh, and "I want a bad boy".


Hugs, Zara