I'm writing. What are you doing?
Here's a giggle for the day.
PRODUCT WARNINGS
Dumb and Funny Warning Labels On Products
Liquid Plummer: Warning: Do not reuse the bottle to store beverages.
Windex: Do not spray in eyes.
Bowl Fresh: Safe to use around pets and children, although it is not recommended that either be permitted to drink from toilet.
Toilet Plunger: Caution: Do not use near power lines.
Dremel Electric Rotary Tool: This product not intended for use as a dental drill.
Arm & Hammer Scoopable Cat Litter: Safe to use around pets.
Endust Duster: This product is not defined as flammable by the Consumer Products Safety Commission Regulations. However, this product can be ignited under certain circumstances. Baby Oil: Keep out of reach of children
Wet-Nap: Directions: Tear open packet and use.
Dial Soap: Directions: Use like regular soap.
Stridex Foaming Face Wash: May contain foam.
Hairdryer: Do not use while taking a shower.
Sleeping Pills: Warning: May cause Drowsiness
Christmas Lights: Warning: For indoor or outdoor use only.
Bic Lighter: Ignite lighter away from face.
Komatsu Floodlight: This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark
Fire Extinguisher: Caution: Non-Flammable
Earplugs: These ear plugs are nontoxic, but may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe
Matches: Caution: Contents may catch fire.
Pepper Spray: Caution: Never aim spray at your own eyes.
Auto-Shade Windshield Visor: Warning: Do not drive with sunshade in place. Remove from windshield before starting ignition.
Fix-a-Flat: WARNING: Do not weld can to rim.
Rain Gauge: Suitable for outdoor use.
RCA Television Remote Control: Not Dishwasher Safe
Road Sign: Caution water on road during rain.
Camera: This camera will only work when film is inside.
Road Sign: Cemetery Road. Dead End
Rowenta Iron: Warning: Never iron clothes on the body.
Slush Puppy Cup: This ice may be cold
American Airlines Peanuts Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
Nabisco Easy Cheese: For best results, remove cap.
Swanson TV Dinners: This product must be cooked before eating.
Hershey's Almond Bar Warning: May contain traces of nuts
Heinz Ketchup Instructions: Put on food
500-piece puzzle: Some assembly required.
Bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)Do not turn upside down.
Korean kitchen knife: Warning keep out of children
Hand-held Massaging Device: Do not use while sleeping or unconscious.
Aim-n-Flame fireplace lighter.> Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks.
Knife sharpening stone Warning: knives are sharp!
Rat Poison Warning: has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice.
UPDATE: I should have checked my supply of envelopes when I was at Walmart yesterday (yes, that's another post). I've run out. I've only got a little over half of them done - off to post office in a bit. The following people will have to wait until I get to Walmart again on Friday. Sorry! Diane, Michele, Toni (well, you have to wait until Susie returns the book *gg*), Christa, and Ruby.
32 comments:
The bottom one is trying to warn you what will happen to you, if you use it. LOL! These are all Darwin awards waiting to happen. *g*
Good ones, Eve! =D
I'm just catching up after the weekend, and I just love these. On the bag that the dogs' food comes in, it states quite clearly "Not tested on animals".
Good luck with the writing. The advice offered has been brilliant. Stick with it.
Oh, and Bailey is absolutely gorgeous. But you know that. And he knows that...
I'm entertaining my parents, ordering a washing machine/tumble dryer, and hopefully making some phone calls for interviews for a book ...
ROTFL
You realize of course, that most of those warnings came about because some brilliant people out there, DID do the things there are now warnings against.
So what does that say about our gene pool?
And, if they went to court and WON against these companies, what does that say about our judicial system?
That you can be legally stupid and can be assured to get paid for it?
The dumbing down of America .. be afraid, be VERY afaid!
Ellen Degeneres did a skit about being an operator for a shampoo company, on the other end of the line when you call the number on the bottle's small print, "If you have any problems call..." You just have to hear it.
Hey, the lady that sponsored that writing contest took down her site because of all the negative back lash she got for judging...
Jordan - Yes, as Michele says, the funny part is that people would have had to do these things in the first place in order for the warning to be posted. Darwins unite! *gg*
Kelly - thanks.
Shirley - same thing with cat food bag. And yes, Bailey knows it.
Diane - have a good time with your parents.
Michele - very, very afraid.
Scott - Knowing Ellen I bet its hysterical. That's too bad about the site. Whenever someone enters these contests they need to be aware of who is judging and decide then whether they feel that the person is qualified to judge or not. Sour grapes. I didn't enter Jason's because I was in that "I'm worthless and can't write" mode that writers go through from time to time. The thing is, as I always say, it's my blog and I'll do what I want as long as it isn't illegal or immoral. I feel for the lady - nobody wants negative feedback. She didn't deserve it. If they didn't think she was qualified, they should never have entered.
The sad thing is that someone must have tried some of this stuff. Great start to a gloomy Monday morning, Eve!
What is scary about these warnings is that there was a reason they are there, i.e., someone has tried to do some of this stuff. No doubt someone has sat in the bathtub and decided to blow their hair dry. People are stupid.
Ever read the coffee lid from a coffee at McDonald's? It says: Caution this product is hot.
No, really? I still remember the woman who sued McD's because she spilled hot coffee....on herself! Michele is right. Not only do we seem to be dumbing down, we are becoming TOO litigious. Like the people who wanted to sue fast food makers because they became overweight. Um, nobody held a gun to their head and made them eat it. Also, most of those resteraunts have their nutrition information available (scarey to look at though).
Brandy
As I was reading these, that's the case I remember too.
Thanks for the laughs. You sure brightened a blah morning!
Best wishes with the writing!
Joely - glad I could help get your Monday going.
Rene - That's what makes those Loony Laws that I post sometimes so strange because you know that someone had to have done those things in order for them to think about making a law against them.
Brandy and Christa - I am in no way defending the woman BUT McDonald's is responsible for the extent of her injuries. You see, they were serving their coffee way above industry standards. In other words, they were in violation of the law - which was put in place so that when stupid people put styrofoam cups of coffee between their legs and spill the coffee they won't be injured as badly - the degree of burns wouldn't have been so bad. There's always been stupid people, we just now have to protect ourselves against their stupidity. And the fast food cases? Don't get me started on that one.
Thanks Susan.
>>Toilet Plunger: Caution: Do not use near power lines.
WTF?????????
Ok I have a proposal I want in the mail today so off I go!
LOL!!! Those are too funny.
Ah, wasn't sure of all the particulars of the coffee case. Thanks for clarifying that. As for fast food, that (to me) is a common sense thing. Dh and I agree that our society is to blame for our own troubles, we just don't want to take the blame.
ROFL!!! I'm constantly amazed (though I guess I shouldn't be) at how stupid some people can be.
But it's good to know the cat litter is safe for use around pets. *g*
Well, it sure seems as if there are a lot of...um, backward people around. Well, I guess some are just bad translation but others...? But people have been known to do incredibly stupid things.
When I sold Avon, we had a wicker teapot for sale, a cute white one with blue trim. My friend came to me and said, "You won't believe this but one of my customers gave the teapot back to me. She said, "I can't make any tea in this. It all just runs out."
I guess you collect all kinds of oddities. Definitely good for groans and laughs.
Hey, *g* looks as if you're discriminating against us poor Canadians! (Definitely kidding) Well, you might as well get rid of the easier ones first. It's so generous of you to even send books all the way here.
Oh, BTW, another blogging friend of mine just put up some horrifying statistics on her website. It's something everybody should be aware of, especially women. See http://camys-loft.blogspot.com/
What a giggle! We've got a boiler for making coffee in the staffroom at school that has a warning sign "Caution: hot water!" Duh! ;-)
Cece - I don't know if I really want to know.
Kelley - welcome! Thanks.
Brandy - Now don't get me wrong, the woman got too much money. But McDonald's was just looking for an accident to happen by having the coffee way too hot. Normally, coffee served in fast food restaurants (I don't know if it applies to dine-in restaurants) should only cause minor burns. We as a society will not take responsibility for their own actions.
Tori - yes, I can rest easily now.
Ruby - LOL, nope - I took out the ones who mentioned specific books first, plus the newcomers to the bookdraw (because the long term bloggers are used to me dragging my tail on sending things *gg*). I only had one large envelope (hey Susan), so anything else that had to go in a larger envelope had to wait. And I'm not saying which one(s) that is. *ggg*
Your teapot story is hysterical. I went to check out the site - that is so tragic.
Siobhan - LOL
Eve - when you take a break in writing today, I've got a 10 second question. Should I remove the Tarzan pic from the blog?
I fear it may fall into one of your "warning" catagories that you listed today. Thanks
Sheesh. Not sure about the service around here ;-)
I like the Tesco pudding one. That's the sort of thing I do all the time :)
In the safety sheets at work (in a marine lab about 10 years ago). Water was listed as a potentially hazardous substance. If you got some in your eye, wash it out with water????
Good luck with the writing.
What am I doing today? writing like a maniac. Apparently every block I had decided to clear itself at 3 am.
Love these!! lol
Just wanted to check in and see how the writing is going? Hope you managed to get some sleep this afternoon.
So if I am stupid enough to believe that my coffee is NOT going to be hot...then I deserve the burns!!! SORRY!!! I in NO WAY believe MCDonalds should have had to pay that stupd broad money! Not to mention is was a couple of million!!!!!
Of course she is the same person who the day before bitched that the coffee was cold! just kidding :) I don't know that :)
I just have a really hard time with our how stupid can I be and make a ton of money philosophy.
But I must say I found the plunger warning hilarious! I keep forgetting that I am not supposed to use that near the power lines! hee hee
Thanks for putting so many of those together in one spot - a lot were new ones too. And along with Cece and Glenice, for the life of me I can't figure out that plunger warning.
These are good! I would love to talk to the people that write them!
How dumb do they think we are!! lol
Michele - nice picture. *gg*
Toni - um, milk?
Lis - yay!
Brandy - nope. Just got up. I don't think the writing was supposed to happen today. Just couldn't sleep last night (and no nap yesterday - so can't blame it on that).
Glenice and Jeanne - I'm curious about the plunger too.
Carol - real dumb. *gg*
>>Hairdryer: Do not use while taking a shower.<<
Luckily the cord doesn't reach. LOL
I got something to take your mind off the envelopes, I am one quarter short to do laundy again. Why only one?
Because that's Murphy's law.
What am I doing? Hmm...well, after skipping out on work the rest of the afternoon (not by choice - had a throbbing headache that I suspect was largely due to my jaw being open for an hour and a half on Saturday) I came home, watched a movie and took a nap. :-)
Sorry about the headache - you're probably right about its source.
Post a Comment