Saturday, September 23, 2006

Survival of the Fittest

Well now, you see it's like this....

A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the rear that are killed. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole because only the fittest survive thus improving the general health and speed of the entire herd.

In much the same way the human brain only operates as quickly as the slowest of it's brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol kills brain cells, as we all know, and naturally the alcohol attacks the slowest/weakest cells first.... So it is as plain as the nose on your face that regular consumption of Guinness will eliminate the weaker, slower brain cells thus leaving the remaining cells the best in the brain. The end result, of course, is a faster more efficient brain.

If you doubt this at all, tell me, isn't it true that we always feel a bit smarter after a few pints?

Sounds good to me ... line 'em up.

Thanks to the wonderful Susie - all packages will be mailed Saturday morning. Three cheers for Susie!!!

15 comments:

Christa said...

I think Susie deserves another Guinness for that. I always found that alcohol messes with a person's coodination, so I figure I have nothing to worry about.

Anonymous said...

That explains EVERYTHING!

Michele said...

Gee, I don't drink, so I'm just chock full of dead brain cells. Oh my!
Not a good way to start a new job, corrupted cells. Geesh!

I wonder if Chocolate coffee helps?

Meretta said...

I'm so glad you've cleared that up for us, Bailey. I'll be sure to let my Guinness drinker know! ;)

Toni Anderson said...

LOL--I know a lot of smart Irishmen :) Good job Susie :D

Anonymous said...

Now that explains all of my problems! I guess I'll have to start drinking. ;)

Anonymous said...

Now that explains all of my problems! I guess I'll have to start drinking. ;)

Anonymous said...

Sorry about the double post...the Guinness hasn't kicked in yet!

Brandy said...

I can't drink, so that leaves me out! Besides, after having my kids, my smart brain cells...just aren't smart anymore! I second Michele's recommendation for chocolate coffee, but can I change that to a latte?

Denise McDonald said...

ya, no - that's all I need is for the dh to get another excuse - LOL

Brandy said...

BTW, loving the dancing dress on your avatar!

catslady said...

I'll drink to that and Susie (hic).

Jordan Summers said...

Smarter, sexier, more philosophical. *ggg*

Anonymous said...

Aah, a worthy scientific theory. But what about the liver cells? Does the same hold true there?

Cheers!

And isn't it odd that I usually feel somewhat queasy when I'm at my limit. Yet when I feel queasy after eating too much, I *want* a sip of whiskey. Doesn't make sense, does it? Maybe it's a good thing that I normally don't have any alcohol around. Oddly enough, it was the alcohol that multiplied during my move instead of getting lost like so much other stuff. I finished off about a half a bottle of sherry for "medicinal" purposes. It was one of those "surprise" finds.

Well, of course, I'm telling the truth. Why would you think I'm not?

Anonymous said...

Well, the packages didn't get out until this morning, but they are on the way. So, watch your mailbox folks!

I like the way you think, Bailey. And I'll take pint in the form of a Horton's or Woodpecker Cider, thank you very much.